Appreciation Radiation
Appreciation is one of those qualities, a virtue really, that has to do with relationship. That makes it less abstract, more real. Of course all virtues have to do with relationship in some way. Anyway, I can deal with appreciation.
Appreciation also is low key. You might say it is an unappreciated virtue. It is different from honoring or complimenting. It locates the action in the appreciator while still focusing on the appreciated. It is a statement of one’s own feelings.
It is easier to accept than a straightforward compliment. It does not make the appreciated person self conscious like it might if you said you were inspired by them or how wonderful they were.
The trick of appreciation is to not ascribe a virtue to the appreciatee.
And it does not exist as a judgment, as something separate from you, it does not have that force. It registers simply as the expression of a positive reaction.
(I do understand that appreciation can apply to other things besides human beings, like nature.)
Appreciation is effective in changing the attitude of the person doing the appreciation.
“It is twice blessed. It blesseth him that gives, and him that takes.”
Instead of asking, “Why aren’t you happy?,” you might ask. “What do you appreciate about your life right now?” Or the day, or your environment, or a person in your life.
You don’t have to go whole hog in appreciating. You can single out a small part of a situation or person, but if you say you especially appreciate something, that also implies that there are other things worth appreciating too. It kind of spreads out the appreciation. I call that “appreciation radiation.”
When you claim to appreciate something, you are implicitly stating that you have good taste. Or maybe that you have confidence in your own taste. But it does not acquire the weight of judgment. It is a kinder positive assessment.
“I appreciate the difficulty of the situation you are in.” That has a different quality than “I understand the difficulty…” Don’t you think?
This is the appreciation cycle: observe, respect, assess, acknowledge. Repeat.
I appreciate that I am done writing now. I appreciate that you have read this far. The word “appreciate” has now lost all meaning to me.
The end of appreciation.
